Melda Clark

DOES YOUR CHEWING GUM LOSE ITS FLAVOUR?

One of my favourite children’s books, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day, begins with, “I went to sleep with gum in my mouth and now there’s gum in my hair and when I got out of bed this morning I tripped on the skateboard and by mistake I dropped my sweater in the sink while the water was running and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.”…

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A Nuisance by the name of Rascal the Relentless Raccoon

We have a house guest by the name of Rascal the Relentless Raccoon, Triple R for short. Actually, he is no longer a guest, but a nuisance, a BIG nuisance. He has overstayed his welcome and has been ordered evicted, but he is a stubborn sort and refuses to cooperate. Why couldn’t Triple R be a mouse, a bat, a rat, a porcupine or a skunk? Traps take care of mice and rats, Glenn is a pro at catching bats, we can shoo the…

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JEFF FOXWORTHY MAY BE A REDNECK, BUT I’M A WEST HEADER…

SALT HERRING & THE TURTLE POND IN WEST HEAD If you drank water from the schoolhouse turtle pond, you might be a West Header. If you ate salt herring and potatoes before you could walk, you might be a West Header. If you call your friends “Pard,” you might be a West Header. If you went “sandying” between Christmas and New Year’s, you might be a West Header. If you caught sculpins from Gaetz’s Point, you might be a West Header. ORCHARDS…

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DO YOU LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND OR LISTEN TO REPLY?

To anyone out there who’s hurting — it’s not a sign of weakness to ask for help. —Barack Obama— The deaths by suicide of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain have been front and centre of late. This has given some the courage to divulge information about family members who died by suicide. Others have spoken openly for the first time about dark periods in which they contemplated suicide. I have lived with depression for most of my adult life. The profound pain…

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Uncle Ed, a Pair of Hush Puppies, and a Barrel of Salt Bait

One of my brothers and his wife dropped by earlier in the week and we spent a lot of time telling stories about our Uncle Ed, Dad’s oldest brother. Edwin Lensley Roache was born on October 6, 1913. He was profoundly deaf and mute and lived with his parents until their deaths. Uncle Ed knew every nook and cranny of West Head from a lifetime of daily walks along the shore. He was a master at finding and picking blueberries and cranberries.…

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yellow-house-in-nova-scotia

Expect the Unexpected at the Yellow House with the Red Roof

The yellow house with a red roof at 281 West Head RD has been home for almost two weeks. My superman husband, Glenn, has unpacked all the boxes and put everything away. The boxes were picked up by the recycling truck this morning. Thank you, Glenn! We had a few broken items: a smashed 55” television, a broken leg on an antique rocking chair, a badly damaged antique sewing stand, a dented brass bed, and most amusing of all, one…

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Our Next Move is to the Nursing Home

DAY ONE Believe me when I say, moving is not for the faint of heart. Moving 1700 km from one province to another quadruples the stress. It seemed like a great idea in the beginning. By the time the moving vans were loaded and on their way, we were questioning our decision. Who’s idea was this anyway? MY FIRST MISTAKE We have two vehicles which meant I had to drive one. No problem. I am a good sport and enjoy a challenge now and…

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college-graduates

Will I Attend My Teachers’ College Reunion?

May 2018 marks the 40th anniversary of my graduation from the Nova Scotia Teachers’ College.  After College, I applied for jobs anywhere, but Nova Scotia. It was time to spread my wings and soar and live the life I wanted. After all, I was going to be the grand old age of 21 in September of that year. With a red face and long nose, I confess that I applied for jobs for which I was woefully unqualified such as a…

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yellow-house-in-nova-scotia

A Bittersweet Life Change

In 2004, Glenn and I made a major life change. We purchased Monk Funeral Home in beautiful Bobcaygeon, Ontario. Friends and family thought we had taken leave of our senses, but we had news for them. Our senses abandoned us years ago and we have been looking for them ever since. I believe they left the country. Chaos Reigned Supreme We arrived in Bobcaygeon on February 6th, exhausted and unable to find the funeral home we had just purchased — only slightly…

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basket-of-eggs

HANKERING FOR THE MUSHY FOODS OF MY CHILDHOOD

I love mushy, soggy food, even if it is supposed to be crispy or crunchy. As well, I like eating cold food that should be hot — like a can of Campbell’s Tomato Soup straight from the fridge or a lukewarm cup off coffee. And that’s not all — I used to put my frozen ice cream in the oven to soften it. I believe these unusual eating habits are deeply rooted in my childhood and provide warm, fuzzy feelings. There was, however,…

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