HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW ME?

Some people would claim I will do almost anything for a laugh. Others would say I am a quiet, shy, aloof person. I would never tell a lie…or would I? Below, you will find eight statements about me. Your job is to decide if each one is true or false. As our granddaughter Maddie would say, “READY, STEADY, GO!”

 TRUE     Melda rode a camel in Morocco    FALSE

 TRUE     Melda asked a NS Tory candidate to put money in her piggy bank.    FALSE

 TRUE     Melda forged her Dad’s name on a report card.     FALSE

TRUE     Melda forged her Mother’s name on a cheque.     FALSE

TRUE     Melda had head lice and scabies.     FALSE

TRUE     Melda lost her Nova Scotia’s Teacher’s College ring.     FALSE

TRUE     Melda once told a doctor she was going to knit him a rhubarb pie.     FALSE

TRUE     Melda has always been fascinated with cash registers.     FALSE

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Would you believe every item is true? Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye.

CHECK OUT THE EXPLANATIONS BELOW.

  1. I went on a high school trip to Spain and Morocco. While in Morocco, I actually paid money to ride a camel. Somewhere, there is a picture, but I can’t put my fingers on it. Maybe I will find it in Nova Scotia. Ya think so?
  2. When I was a little girl, the Conservative candidate for Southwest Nova Scotia and other riding executives came to our house for a feed of lobsters. Mom was mortified when I appeared at the table with my piggy bank soliciting donations. Shame, shame!Pink-Piggy-Bank
  3. Elementary school report cards used to ask parents to indicate how much time was spent on homework and the average number of hours of sleep. I took the opportunity to exaggerate both and then signed Dad’s name on the report card. Shocking, I know!
  4. Good grief, how many names have I forged a name? Mom sent me to the bank to cash a cheque for her. When I reached the teller, she noticed the cheque had not been signed. What did I do? I went over to the desk, signed Mom’s name and went back to the same teller. The teller looked back and forth at me several times, certain that I had signed it, but cashed it anyway. Nervy Melda!
  5. Yes, guilty as charged. Lice and scabies have a constant presence in schools. I had head lice in Grade Primary and scabies in Grade 5, but I never ever got chicken pox. Scratch, scratch!
  6. I saved or, more likely, begged mom and Dad for money to buy a Nova Scotia Teachers’ College ring, with the giant “T”.  The ring went missing shortly after. Even now, I hope someone will find it in some obscure place and post it on Facebook. I even searched for one on eBay, but NSTC rings are as scarce as hens’ teeth. Do hen really have teeth?
  7. People do weird and unpredictable things going under and coming out of general anesthetic. I once told a doctor I was going to knit him a rhubarb pie. Gospel truth!
  8. For a reason I do not understand, I have always been intrigued by cash registers. At one point, I thought I would buy one, but that would be counterproductive because I would have to use all my money to buy one leaving nothing to put in the cash register. Go figure! (But if I had a cash register, I wouldn’t need to figure. Groan!) 

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What about you? Can you tell us something about yourself that would shock the socks off the rest of us? Come on, be a good sport.
We won’t share it on Facebook. Honest…I think.

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