SELLING A HOUSE IS DRIVING ME BATTY

Let me make myself crystal clear. I dislike, no… scorn, no… detest, no… deplore, no… I loathe selling a house. And just exactly what do I dislike about it? That’s simple, EVERYTHING. And what has caused these strong feelings?

Selling three houses in the past. The previous transactions were stress-filled because we were buying another house with the proceeds and could not balance two mortgage payments. That is true for most people.

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According to a study by Vivo Property Buyers, people find the task of selling their home more stressful than other major life events like having a baby, starting a new job or getting a divorce. 

I can vouch for childbirth and starting a new job and I would prefer either of those over selling a house. “Why so stressful?” you may ask.

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Our home is clean, but keeping a “clean house” is not the same as a “show ready” house and now I feel I have crossed over to an alternative universe.

SIGNS OF GOING OVERBOARD

  • Digging for dirt in the shower door tracks with toothpicks and Q-tips.
  • Cleaning the cracks in the hardwood on my hands and knees.
  • Arranging the bottles of spices in alphabetical order.
  • Throwing out all the mugs and glasses that do not match.
  • Stacking the wood for the fireplace according to length.
  • Giving every visitor a bag of “stuff to get rid off” on their way out.
  • Arranging the hangers in the closet the same distance apart.
  • Polishing the light switches and plug-ins compulsively.
  • Cleaning the hinges and other parts of the toilet with a toothbrush.

DIRTY HOUSES SELL TOO

You and I know of many homes that were pigpens that sold quickly and close to asking price. Statistics say it takes three to six months to sell a house, but it is important to consider that some houses sell in a day and others two years. Regardless of what happens, we plan to move to Nova Scotia in April if our house has or has not sold. If you believe that prayer makes a difference, would you please add the sale of our home to your prayer list?

This checklist may help you sell your home.

On a lighter note, according to Jack Handley:

If you’re ever selling your house, and some people come by, and a big rat comes out and he’s dragging the rattrap because it didn’t quite kill him, just tell the people he’s your pet and that’s a trick you taught him.

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One day, the right family will love and buy our beautiful Bobcaygeon home. The months of frustration will only be a memory, a MEDIOCRE memory, no…a GOOD memory,no… a GLORIOUS memory, no… a SPLENDID memory, no… a MAGNIFICENT memory, no… a SUBLIME memory, no…a DIVINE memory, NO! Then what? A  SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIUS …YES!

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